Keep Your Kids Learning This Summer – and Have Fun Doing It

If you have a school aged child, then summer learning loss has probably worried you in the past – but never as much as this summer. This school year was a once-in-a-generation experiment in educational innovation. Your child probably experienced virtual school for the first time, and they may have even been in virtual school the whole year. If the coming of summer has you wondering whether your child will be prepared for the next academic year, you’re not alone.

But if you think that means it’s time to hire a summer tutor, think again. Many school systems are offering catch-up summer school, but after a year that brought unprecedented stress to children as well as adults, more time in the classroom may not be what your child needs. Before you shell out your stimulus check for a summer math class, consider what education your child really needs to be prepared for the next school year. 

There’s plenty of academic education to discover in the adventures of real life – and after a year in front of the computer, real-life adventure may be exactly what your child needs most. 

Practice real-life math with cooking. 

Remember all that sourdough you baked last spring? Maybe it’s time to break out your starter yeast again. Cooking, and especially baking, offers plenty of opportunities for kids of all grade levels to practice math skills. Younger kids can measure and count; older kids can convert recipes for different numbers of servings (hello, fractions!). Try doubling the recipe and bringing a loaf of sourdough to your neighbor. For bonus skills, have your kids invent a recipe of their own. 

Explore science at the park.

Science was invented in the great outdoors, and nature is the best teacher for kids of all ages. The inherent curiosity of kids makes them naturals at the scientific method: they’re constantly observing and asking questions about what they see. This summer, instead of googling the answers, help them figure it out for themselves with real-life experiments. Can that broken dogwood branch grow into a new tree? What do ladybugs eat? Only time – and a bit of experimenting – will tell. 

Take a geography trip. 

After a year of quarantining, many of us are itching to get out of town this summer. If you are heading out of town, take some of the planning off your plate and teach your kids geography by inviting them to plan part of your route. While they’re practicing skills like reading maps and estimating travel time, they can search for interesting points along the route that they want to visit. In addition to adding some adventure to your trip, having your kids identify locations they want to see – and predict how long it will take to get there – should cut down the endless whines of “Are we there yet?” 

Read, read, read.

As a parent in the 21st century, the value of reading with your kids has been drilled into you from the day you found out you were expecting. But if reading has gotten a little stale after months of being stuck in the house, try something different to spark your kids’ love of stories. Spend an afternoon in the library together, or hit up the library storytime. And if an overuse of screen time during quarantine has your kids bored by non-moving words on a page, try downloading some audiobooks to listen to together while you do a craft, or read a book and then watch the movie. 

Play board games. 

Board games are a lot more than a fun family night – they’re an amazing tool for teaching a wide range of social and academic schools. In addition to helping kids practice taking turns and following the rules, board games can teach math (Monopoly), reading (Cards Against Humanity Kids’ Edition), and even logic (Clue). While there are plenty of board games that are explicitly educational, pretty much every board game requires some academic skills to play, so play what your kids enjoy! 

Write stories. 

Sitting down and writing a story over the summer may not appeal to your kids – but storytelling is a human instinct, and there are plenty of ways to help your kids rediscover the joy of sharing their ideas through narrative. Try getting them a set of puppets and building a makeshift puppet stage, or download an app for green screen so they can make movies with their toys. Encourage them to write the story down so they can perform it for you (and maybe even the neighbors, too). 

Learn social studies through advocacy. 

2020 was a big year for political upheaval, and many people found themselves involved in political advocacy, often for the first time. Talk with your kids about political news, especially local issues that affect them. What rules will their school follow for COVID safety in the fall? What guidelines does the county have now for swimming pools this summer? Kids can write letters to representatives, call the school superintendent, and even make signs about an issue they care about. 

Watch for learning opportunities.

After a year of spending so much time together with family, paying attention may be the most difficult thing to do this summer  – but it’s by far the most important. Curiosity and interest are the biggest drivers of learning, and if you want to help your kids’ academic progress over the summer, the best thing you can do is pay attention. Notice when they ask questions. Notice what they’re interested in. Then look for ways for them to explore those interests and questions. When kids are interested, that’s when they learn. 

This past year of upheaval and change has been harder for parents than for anyone. After a year of worrying about COVID, working while teaching virtual school, and struggling to entertain bored children, the last thing you need is to add more stress this summer. Instead of working hard to make sure your children catch up on academics, seek out ways to let learning happen naturally – and make it fun for you as well as your kids. Fun, after all, is the best way to learn.

5 Ways to Prepare Your Teen for Adulting

High school graduation, check. College decisions, check. Job applications, check. You’ve guided and supported your teen toward the next phase of their life. Or perhaps your teen has a few more years before graduation. But before you know it they’ll be fully grown, and there’s more to adulthood than the academic knowledge they receive in high school. 

This summer is the perfect opportunity to catch your teen up on any life management skills they’re missing. Here are five ways to help your teen get ready for the big day, when they head out on their own – whether they are off to college, or simply onto their own apartment.

Ask your teen to cook a family meal.

Soon-to-be-freshman might be eating most of their meals next year in a college cafeteria, but they should still know how to cook a real meal before they leave home. Being able to cook something more than ramen will give your young adult a boost on healthy diet habits. Cooking dinner for the whole family will give them some practice at putting together an entire meal instead of just one dish. Bonus? You’ll get a night off. (Added bonus tip: If you’ve got a teen that needs to earn some spending money, hiring them to regularly cook dinner for the family is a win/win for you both.)

Let them do laundry. 

If your teen isn’t already washing their own laundry, it’s definitely time. With a brief lesson on how to sort and what temperature to use, they’ll be able to avoid being that freshman whose white t-shirts are all pink from being washed with colors. Your child may not want to fold their socks as neatly as you do (or at all), but giving them responsibility for their own clothes early in their teen-hood prepares them for a lifetime of caring for their own clothes. 

Give them bills to pay.

Chances are you’ll be helping your teen – even your new graduate – with their living expenses for a few more years, but that doesn’t mean they can’t start paying some of their bills and managing their budget before they leave home. If your teen isn’t already paying for some of their own expenses like cell phone, gas, or clothes, this summer is a great time to start. Obviously, in order to pay their own bills, they’ll need some income, so if they won’t have a job this summer, consider giving them an allowance or pay for help with chores so they have a budget to work with. 

Let them clean the bathroom.  

The stereotype of the dirty college dorm room bathroom may have more to do with students not making time to clean than not knowing how, but if you’re not confident that your teen can clean their bathroom, this summer is a good time to make sure. This goes for other household cleaning as well. It’s never too early to include teens in helping keep the house tidy.

Help your teen plan for emergencies

As a parent, this one could be hard to think about. But if your teen will be living away from home next year, they might need to handle an emergency on their own. Do they know what to do if they’re in a car accident? What about if their apartment pipes freeze? Talk through emergency scenarios with them and make sure they have a plan for the major situations life might throw their way. 

If some of these tasks are new for your graduate, they’ll probably give you some pushback – after all, it’s summer and time to kick back after the rush to wrap up the school year. But knowing how to take care of household tasks before they leave your house will be worth it for them in the long run.

Nurturing Attitudes

When I was a teen, my mother pretty regularly told me to “stop with the attitude”, “change your attitude”, or “watch the attitude”. If you have teens, you probably know what she meant. A  teenager’s approach to their blossoming independence often comes with some changes in attitude.

But teenagers aren’t the only ones that have attitudes. Part of being human is the process of forming attitudes and people of all ages have them.

What are attitudes and where do they come from?

Attitudes are ideas that we hold about ourselves, others, objects, or experiences. We can have a favorable attitude about something, a negative attitude, or even an ambivalent attitude. All of our likes and dislikes are formed by the attitudes we hold about those things. 

For example, you might have heard people talk about “cat people” and “dog people.” I grew up with both a cat and a dog in our household. I remember enjoying them both equally and never preferred one over the other. I never had a bad experience with either cats or dogs. And yet, today I admit I am a dog person. Dogs are friendly, cuddly, and always delighted to spend time with you. While some cats are also friendly, cats are often aloof, standoffish, and uninterested in cuddling. 

I’ve had some unpleasant experiences with cats as an adult. So it is not surprising that I ended up with this attitude about cats. Despite a pleasant childhood surrounded by both a cat and a dog, my experiences with cats have resulted in an attitude about cats that isn’t very favorable.

Psychologists define attitude as an evaluation a person makes about an object, person, group, event, or issue. I have definitely made a judgement about cats. Since our attitudes can be favorable, neutral, or unfavorable, we can have attitudes about both things we like and things we dislike.

The ABC Model of Attitudes

There are three components of an attitude, often referred to as the ABC model. The first component, A, stands for ‘Affective.’ Before we form an attitude, we experience or observe something. 

We may have a physical reaction that results from the chemical changes that occur as our brain processes the experience. For example, suppose I see a spider scurry up the wall beside me. Without conscious thought, my body reacts by jumping away.

This is the second component of the ABC model of attitudes, Behavioral. The experience results in feelings or emotions inside us and in response we take an action or behave in some particular way. 

Our experience and resulting behavior help us form a belief and an attitude about it. The third component is Cognitive, our conscious thought process. We form a belief based on the experience or observation. That spider startled me and I don’t like to be surprised. So I form an attitude about spiders.  

The attitudes we have formed as a result of our experiences and observations affect how we respond to new experiences. As parents and educators, understanding the way attitudes are formed can help us nurture healthy attitudes in the children in our care.

Join us virtually on Wednesday, June 2nd, for an indepth look at Nurturing Attitudes in the children in our care. Dr. Aoife Magee will guide participants as we examine the three components of attitude and explore approaches that promote diversity, equity, inclusion, and anti-bias in early childhood. We will explore practices to develop positive environments for growth and learning among children, families, and professionals. 

The workshop will be held online from 6:30pm – 8:30pm. To register: email poel@linnbenton.edu or call 541-917-4899.

Nurturing Strength in Children of All Ages

Our children come to us as helpless infants. As we care for them, we watch them grow stronger and develop skills. Newborns gain strength daily, becoming strong enough to hold up their head and control the movements of their arms and legs. 

Usually, when we hear the word ‘strength’ our thoughts immediately go to brawn and muscle – the physical ability to lift heavy objects. We don’t often think of young children as being strong, since strength is something you develop as your body grows and matures.

But strength can apply more than just the abilities of our muscles. 

There are other kinds of strength, like emotional strength, mental strength, character strength, social strength, and skill strength, such as athletic ability or artistic ability.

This month, Dr. Aoife Magee invites us to join her in exploring ways to nurture all of these different kinds of strength in our children. 

Mental Strength

Being mentally strong doesn’t mean acting tough or being defiant. Kids with mental strength are ready to meet challenges with confidence and courage. Mentally strong children are resilient, able to handle challenges, and bounce back from difficult situations. Mental strength is sometimes called ‘grit’, which is often defined as courage and resolve, and strength of character.

Helping children develop emotional regulation is the first step in building mental strength. As young children learn how to handle disappointment they are developing resilience and mental strength. As they get older, developing skills in positive self-talk helps build their ability to handle failure and try again. 

Mentally strong children are able to take responsibility for their actions and learn from the consequences when things do not go as they expected.

Emotional Strength

Like mental strength, emotional strength helps children navigate life’s ups and downs. Learning to understand and handle big emotions is part of developing emotional strength. Letting children know their feelings are ok and helping them learn to manage the way they react to their feelings is part of developing emotional strength.

Says Amy Morin, author of “13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do”, social and emotional skills are the biggest predictors of future success.”

As adults, we can help support children’s big feelings by letting them know it’s ok to be frustrated, while helping them manage their behavioral choices when they are frustrated.

Physical Strength

Physical strength is built as children’s bodies grow. Active play builds muscles and encourages the use of their growing bodies. A well-rounded diet that includes fruits, leafy vegetables, and proteins contributes to healthy bodies and the development of physical strength.

KidsSense notes that physical strength and endurance are important to children of all ages: Strength and endurance are important to enable children to perform everyday functions such as fine motor skills (e.g. holding a pencil appropriately, cleaning teeth), gross motor skills (e.g. carrying heavy school bags, walking, running, skipping, playground skills such as climbing, and sporting skills such as catching, throwing and hitting a ball with a bat). Muscular endurance helps maintain proper posture all day long.”

Maintaining an active lifestyle, with lots of opportunity for running and jumping, climbing and lifting helps growing children build both physical strength and muscular endurance.

Nurturing Strength

We will explore ways to nurture all kinds of strength in our children at the next session of our Nurturing Children series.

Join us online at 6:30pm, Wednesday, May 5th as we take a deeper dive into ways to help children and families grow stronger together. Nurturing Strength will explore the strength-building power of attachment and positive relationships, social-emotional support for resilience, aids to physical development, and the usefulness of mindfulness practices for building strength in children and families.

To register send an email to: poel@linnbenton.edu or call: 541-917-4899.

Strengthening Adult Relationships

Our primary relationships – with our partners, our children, and our immediate family  bring us joy and enhance our life. Social connections are part of being human and our relationships with other adults offer important support. 

Social distancing during the pandemic has been hard on us all. It runs counter to our natural inclination and desire to spend time with others enjoying each other’s company and building relationships                                                           

That is because humans are social beings. We enjoy our adult relationships. Not only that, according to HarvardHealth, our social connections also contribute to our long-term health – in ways every bit as powerful as adequate sleep, a good diet, and not smoking. Dozens of studies have shown that people who have satisfying relationships with family, friends, and their community are happier, have fewer health problems, and live longer.

But it’s not always easy to find time for adult relationships. Our children and their needs keep us busy from the time our feet hit the floor in the morning until we stumble, exhausted, back into bed at night. 

But as challenging as finding the time for our friends can be, making time for our adult relationships can help us refuel and provide much-needed emotional support.

Tips for strengthening adult relationships

Here are a few ways to strengthen the adult relationships in your life.

Relationships with significant others/spouses

Spending time together is the number one way to build relationships. It’s easy to let our relationship with our partner take a back seat to all the logistics of family life, but being intentional about carving out time without the children, can go a long way to strengthening our relationships. The Gottman Institute recommends  six specific steps  you can take to strengthen your romantic relationship.

Relationships with siblings

Our siblings are the people who know us best and have been there as we’ve become adults. Says Janessa McQuivey, “In many families, sibling relationships make an abrupt shift when individuals enter young adulthood and leave the home. Some adult siblings find themselves spread across multiple states. Distance can be further complicated with differing life stages – college, work, marriage, and children. Many find they don’t spend as much time connecting with their siblings as they would like.”

She offers this tip for deepening sibling relationships later in life. “Little steps and deliberate moments of kindness can help siblings feel loved, have a greater desire to stay in touch, and lead to deeper, more satisfying relationships in years to come.” 

Relationships with childhood friends

Are there people you knew when you were younger that you’ve lost touch with? Take a little time to reach out. You may find you still have a lot in common.  Technology can facilitate friendship across long distances. When the pandemic started eliminating outside activities and keeping us at home, many people found time to initiate regular Zoom ‘happy hour’ gatherings with friends far and wide, virtually.

Making new friends

Parenting can be isolating. When we focus all of our attention on our children and their  schedules we may be missing opportunities to cultivate new friendships with other adults. Where can we find new friends? Here are just a few possibilities:

  • Be open to getting to know the other adults in the lives of your children’s friends and your children’s school. 
  • Be active with groups that engage in activities you enjoy (running club, biking club, the gym). 
  • Consider volunteering with an organization doing work you believe in. 
  • Participate in small group activities at church. 
  • Take a class through the local community ed organization. 
  • Join a PSN parenting class, where many participants form friendships that last for years after the formal class has ended.

The Parenting Success Network offers opportunities for parents with children of all ages to gather with others who are at similar stages of their parenting journey. Classes are offered continuously, with every class posted on the events calendar of the website.  Join us for a class today. You might just meet your new best friend as you strengthen both your parenting skills and your adult relationships.